This week the media has been busy surmising as to why Paris Hilton and her partner Carter Reum chose surrogacy.
While it’s lovely that surrogacy is getting some press- we love when it’s normalized, the fact that the media believes it has rights to the medical or social reason behind it is absolutely absurd.
There is a significant difference between privacy and secrecy, and the media isn’t getting on this one.
Surrogacy is a means to have a child, and the reason behind it is private. Our view on the story is that it’s the child born through surrogacy’s story to share, if and when they chose, in a way that they choose to share it. While pregnancy and birth announcements are exciting, in over 15 years of doing this work, I have spoken to countless Intended parents who have been blindsided by nosey questions, whether a heterosexual couple being asked if the father had sex with the surrogate, to gay dads being asked who the “real” or biological father is, really, whatever happened to a simple congratulations.
Finally, I’ll leave you with this.
It’s not the responsibility of infertile people, or those working with a surrogate for social reasons, celebrities included. To explain the “why” or to do the work to ensure you are comfortable with the “why”.
Let us know what you think we’d love to hear from you reach out to us.