Have you ever heard the saying “Hope is contagious”? When we look at the social media landscape with regards to friends we have, businesses we follow and people whom inspire us, we rarely see massive amounts of negativity. The normal social climate is a positive one, it is normally the highlight reel of someones life, not the bloopers version. But the honest to goodness reality is, our lives are not a highlight reel. They are the bloopers version!
At CFC we have both Intended Parent, and Surrogate online communities, and we encourage those in our program to get connected, and stay connected. We have noticed that in the Surrogates group, there are hourly posts: encouraging each other, sharing positive pregnancy tests, words of encouragement, general information and journey updates and resources. Our Surrogate community is one that is absolutely vibrant, and fueled by hope and perseverance. Women come online and share the good, the bad, and the ugly with their lives and journeys. Its so refreshing for those going through difficult times to see a post they can exactly relate too! A problem shared is a problem halved, a saying that proves very true in our Surrogate Facebook community!
We have unfortunately heard from Intended parents that they aren’t comfortable sharing in their group for various reasons,
I don’t want others to be jealous, or sad that we have achieved a pregnancy and they haven’t.
I don’t want to post our bad news, bringing the group down.
We don’t want to post resources, and appear to be “know it alls”.
We have to say that for new Intended parents coming in, they often ask “why” don’t people post, as they are new to the process, and maybe haven’t experienced set backs, or haven’t had exposure to some of the comments that can cut, and scare people from sharing. Our hope is that Intended parents won’t be afraid to share, and would become open about their experiences- both positive and negative. This journey is one riddled with isolation, but by reaching out and sharing your experiences you are encouraging someone to say: ” Hey!! That’s my experience too!” Baby pictures, positive pregnancy tests, news of being matched with a Surrogate are great conversation starters. Beginning a dialogue will begin to build friendships, and community, which during this process is so necessary. We are all connected throughout this amazing process, and for some the road seems “easy” but until we are real with one another we really don’t know if what is displayed on social media is a highlight reel, or their bloopers version. You are not alone here, we are all here for you! Lets be real.